While i grew up in the countryside — mainly at raves or up trees — that doesn’t mean i know what to do in it. London has worn away my wildling skills and now i’m 90% useless in a field without a soundsystem.
So this week me and my 10.5 month old pretended we knew what we were doing on our trip to the shire to see our incredible family: and here are our scientific findings.
1. Get butt naked. Feral nappy-free time sounds terrifying, but it’s one of the cutest ways to spend a few hours plus QT butt gets some air on that evil teething nappy rash. There’s also the added bonus of a Russian roulette game every time baby gets cuddled.
2. Eat berries that are safe to eat. Sounds sketchy but it’s obvious what’s OK; iyra loves gooseberries, raspberries and strawberries. She also loves stones, twigs and bird shit but we don’t talk about that.
3. This week we’re learning to call things something other than “DAH”, which is her word for our dog + everything else. There are lots of things to point at and name in the countryside, like bird, bumble bee, butterfly, tree and strange old man in corner of pub. All ideal things to point and shout “DAH” at.
4. At this lovely, sweet, gentle, tender age, my baby mainly wants to SHITTING DESTROY everything. But in the wild, that’s fine. Shredded leaves make fascinating decorations for twigs on trees. Flower heads, when they can’t be sniffed, are way funnier thrown and picked up and thrown again a billion times. What, you don’t get the joke?
5. Just be. While it may feel like you’re simply killing an hour before nap time like you would anywhere, being outside and in nature has sooo many smells, colours, textures and tastes: all top scores for babies’ development. According to forest school ethos: “In the open air, their brains, motivated by the abundance of stimuli, build new neural pathways – the ‘wiring’ of the brain – in order to cope with the vast amount of new information they are processing.” Word.
So don’t rely on the creepy Magic Night Garden for your nature chills. Get it for free in your local park. Just don’t say i didn’t warn you about naked baby Russian poo-lette.
What does your baby or kid like to do outside? Have they learned stuff in a cool, natural, Instagrammable way? And how do you get them to stop eating bird shit? We wana hear from you! Tag us #WokeMamas on Instagram or contact us. Fresh.
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