Want to know WTF a Woke Mama is? Each week, we’re introducing awesome women who are making the world a kinder place, one happy baby at a time.
Name & age: Natalia Segura, 33
Baby: Phoenix Amaru, August 2015
What does being a woke mama mean to you?
Making conscious choices to be the best guide to the development of an amazing human being.
Watching your actions, words and responses to and around your child so that they may learn the qualities that add greatness to a society and not selfish or dishonorable traits.
That being said, becoming a better person yourself. Teaching them to understand themselves and to be kind. Confident, yet humble. How others can affect us and how we can affect others. Choosing alimentation that nourishes a clear and clean vehicle body.
What made you choose gentle parenting? And what is your favourite aspect of it?
I believe gentle parenting is respecting the intelligence and development of a child’s own personality and level of understanding. Not controlling, but being gentle guides. Breeding confidence and comprehension of their own choices. Allowing them to be open to their experiences.
My fav part is definitely seeing them discover the world and in stopping myself from, what would normally be considered “normal parenting reactions”, and letting them discover things for themselves. Watching their curious bewilderment and their brains soak it all up.
It’s amazing how intelligent they truly are. We’ve been so conditioned to be part of a society where someone else tells you how to think or feel. Whether it’s your parent, teacher, principal, boss or spouse. We’ve forgotten to trust our own decisions.
I’ve chosen gentle parenting because I want a better world for my child and I see how children of gentle parenting are better behaved, have better relationships with their parents and how overall nature, fun and intelligent they seem.
Most awesome moment so far?
Everyday I fall deeper in love with my child and motherhood. So, it’s hard to pick one. I think I just melt when he says “mommy” and hugs my neck with pure love. *sigh*
Biggest struggle so far? How do you cope with stressful moments?
Struggle is definitely when I butt heads with his father in regards to our beliefs and what is best for him. My choices are very open minded and trusting. His are more confined and safe. So we have to meet in the middle sometimes, or I have to explain in depth as to why I believe a different response would be healthier for our son.
I listen to his views to and we make a decision based on the understanding or yielding of one of our beliefs. Sometimes we can’t find a middle ground though.
I cope with stress by singing, going for a slow walk. Breathing. It helps calm me down when I get fired up.
How do you juggle work with gentle parenting?
I’ve been working on and off, and so has his father. So we seem to find balance to having one of us always with him (unless we absolutely can’t) and always “checking” ourselves.
It’s a big challenge on ourselves, but we notice (very obviously) how it affects him when we slip into bad habits. Fortunately we are quick to catch ourselves and then reevaluate how we can change our words/actions to correct how he is perceiving it.
Any advice you would give to new mums?
Follow your gut, but also, think of what kind of human being you are nurturing.
Never take for granted how much you affect them indirectly too. They are ALWAYS watching. How they see you react to people, places, situations or things is how they’ll come to understand (or mimic) how to respond in their lives.
It’s the ultimate test (or understanding) of our own traumas. All your own junk and baggage you need to evaluate and avoid passing the bad stuff on. Constant work on yourself to be the best to them.
Also, don’t be so hard on yourself. It’s not an easy job. Just do your best. Everyone will have advice to give, go with what resonates and feels right.
Finally, DONT COMPARE! Every child developed diffently and comparison will only stress you. If you can’t help but compare, use it to motivate you to learn how you can be or more service to your little amazing human.
What’s on your soundtrack to your first year of being a Woke Mama?
Anything from “Nahko & Medicine for the People” (he loves howling to “the wolves have returned”) and anything by India Arie.
Like what ya see? We’ll be introducing more awesome Woke Mamas. But we want to hear from YOU. Share your stories on social media using #WokeMamas or write your answers here. ❤
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