Want to know WTF a Woke Mama is? Each week, we’re introducing awesome women who are making the world a kinder place, one happy baby at a time.
Name & age: Lottie, 25
Kids: Mia, 2 and Ameera, 6 months old.
What does being a woke mama mean to you?
To me, being a woke mama means understanding that our children see things through innocent eyes; they don’t know how they got here and they are learning things as they go along.
It means putting ourselves in their mindset and looking at the positives in their mess, in their finger painting, in their loudness. Keeping an open mind so that they will be open-minded, too.
It also means being gentle on ourselves. Too often we put pressure on ourselves to be perfect parents (myself included) without realising that our little ones love us just the way we are. And if we are hard on ourselves too often, they may also end up being too hard on themselves in the future. We can’t teach balance to the future generation without meeting our own equilibrium.
What made you choose gentle parenting? And what is your favourite aspect of it?
Like many others, I read everything on sleep training and scheduled feedings, etc. Basically, anything that would make my children more convenient for me! But when Mia was born, reality hit and I realised that I had to follow her pace, and do what I could to make her feel loved and supported as she started grasping on the new world around her.
Now that she’s a toddler, she’s exploring and expressing herself more – and unless she’s being dangerous or a bit too rude (2-year-olds, right? ) who am I to tell her that she can’t?
I choose gentle parenting because I want both her and her sister to challenge themselves and the world around them. Women get told enough that we can’t or shouldn’t do what we want to!
And I guess that’s my favourite part of it – knowing that they will one day feel loved and supported with what they choose to do in this world just as they are now.
Most awesome moment so far?
There are plenty to choose from, too many! But the best moments are when they make each other laugh. It usually happens when Mia is jumping on the bed – Ameera somehow finds it the most hilarious thing ever!
Biggest struggle so far? How do you cope with stressful moments?
Taking care of myself has been the biggest struggle. I’m a beauty therapist by trade, so I spend my time at work taking care of others like I do at home. So if I need to de-stress, I’ll “beautify” myself after I put the girls to bed – even if it’s just a once-in-a-blue-moon eyebrow wax.
Any advice you would give to new mums?
Take it day by day. You’re learning how to be a parent just as much as your child is learning all of these wonderful things. The baby books will only tell you so much. Follow your instincts.
And most importantly, don’t be afraid to ask for help – we can’t be superwomen on our own. It really does take a village!
What’s on your soundtrack to your first year of being a Woke Mama?
The Miseducation of Lauryn Hill – that was the first album to calm Mia down and it gets me in the most peaceful of zones!
Follow Lottie on Instagram @elleohells
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