Want to know WTF a Woke Mama is? Each week, we’re introducing awesome women who are making the world a kinder place, one happy baby at a time.
Name & age: N’ketia, 35
Babies: Twin girls Gaudí & Estée born in 2015 and Dante (also a girl) born in 2016
How did you end up doing gentle parenting?
To me, it feels like the most natural, logical, true to myself and therefore only way to parent.
Maybe it has something to do with me being a stay at home mum and having plenty of time to observe my children. When I look at them, I see how great they already are, inside and out. I have no right to belittle them.
Children want the same things as adults basically; love, respect, recognition etc. So I try my best to always respect my daughters.
I take their feelings serious and I love them hard (even if they actually behave like assholes).
What does being a woke mama mean to you?
It means being a love rebel that dares to unlearn everything that isn’t supportive in living my best life.
It means raising a generation that is loving and aware. I will teach my children things they don’t learn in school but are so very valuable in life.
Most awesome moment so far?
Birthing my babies. I had an unexpected but beautiful gentle-section with the twins and after that I had a VBAC. I bow down to vaginas!
Biggest struggle so far? How do you cope with stressful moments?
Being at home day after day with three children under three isn’t the most easy task. I feel stress building up not in particular moments, but when I lack taking time for myself in a while.
Luckily, I’m easily recharged. Stepping out of the situation at home, allowing myself to be more than ‘mama Tia’ for a while is always healing! I’m a simple girl, so a simple cup of tea with a friend can do the trick.
Any advice you would give to new mums?
Trust your gut feeling, about everything. You are the mama and when it comes to knowing what’s best for your child, there’s no one above you.
What’s on your soundtrack to your first year of being a Woke Mama?
Keep breathing by Ingrid Michaelson
Last word: When I became a mother for the first time, I wanted to be perfect. Tidy house, perfect kids, perfect wife and everything.
A lot has changed since then. Looking back, I don’t even recognize myself anymore.
I was holding myself hostage by keeping up with my own crazy expectations and of course it wore me out.
I wish I had someone back then to tell me that everything would still be fine if I slowed down a little.
That I just needed to keep breathing .
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