Want to know WTF a Woke Mama is? Each week, we’re introducing awesome women who are making the world a kinder place, one happy baby at a time.
Name & age: Vanessa & 26
Kids: Nila, 3 and Thunder, 1 year and 10 months
How did you end up doing gentle parenting?
Gentle parenting was something that came naturally to me. I am not perfect, but I am dedicated to break any toxic and abusive patterns in our family.
What does being a woke mama mean to you?
Being a “woke” mama to me means being conscious and aware of the way we parent. It doesn’t mean being perfect, but rather, cognizant of our decisions and actions and the affect it has on ourselves and children.
I try and be as holistically conscious as possible when it comes to our overall health and well-being. I rather do my own research and listen to my intuition, as oppose to taking someone else’s word, particularly when it comes pregnancy, birth, vaccination – and parenting I suppose all together!
Most awesome moment so far?
There are too many awesome moments to choose one, but, if I had to, it would be the first time our eyes met, with both Nila and Thunder.
Biggest struggle so far? How do you cope with stressful moments?
The biggest struggle so far is the feeling of not having that much support. When I feel overwhelmed, I stop what I’m doing, I close my eyes, take deep breaths, and ask for strength and guidance.
Sometimes that requires me going into the bathroom and locking the door to get a moment to myself. Other times, taking a bike ride, going to ocean or the river with the kids does the trick.
Oh, and music. Dancing always helps. We rock out like it’s no ones business.
How do you juggle work with gentle parenting?
As a full time single mom, if I don’t make time for myself, it can be difficult and draining to then serve my clients, so, if I don’t feel good, I won’t stress myself.
Other than that, I make sure the kids take a nap throughout the day (most days) so I can get a break and we have a set bed time which gives me time to relax and reflect on the day, take some time out then get to work.
[Vanessa is a a Spiritual Mentor, Natural Birthworker & Advocate, Tarot & Oracle Card Intuitive and Reiki Master Teacher].
Any advice you would give to new mums?
Advice for news moms is this: Try and find time for yourself and don’t be ashamed in asking for help.
You were not meant to do this alone. Reach out to other moms or people in your community if you need assistance.
What’s on your soundtrack to your first year of being a Woke Mama?
Hm. I would have to say “I am so grateful”. That is a song that I made up and sing almost everyday on our ukulele, particularly 3 weeks after my son was born, almost two years ago now.
The father left me with two children under two, with no family, in a foreign country and that has truly awakened me to being grateful despite my circumstances; therefore, I’d have to say “I am grateful” has been the top soundtrack that has gotten me though the good and the bad – and for that awakening, I am grateful.
Motherhood has been my greatest blessing.
Deep Love and Gratitude to all my Mamas. You’re loved, worthy, and appreciated.
Follow Vanessa’s beautiful and inspiring super spiritual life at @manifestationqueen
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